Gotta strut them city streets, Showin' off my eclat, yeah

Do you remember my gay hamsters? If you don't, or you are new, please go here.

Unfortunately, the rabbit lost the fight. Over time he just gave up. He threw up his little bunny paws, gave me the finger, and headed out the door. To be honest it was an ugly situation and it really didn't work out. I don't think the indictment from the federal government helped the situation. Did I ever tell you his name was 'Scooter'?

To put an end to this heterophobe harassment I am getting from the hamsters I have finally done something that I never thought I would do...we got a cat.

In most situations I don't consider myself a "cat man". A good cat is one twitching on the side of a busy freeway. No, sorry. I can't say that. That is just cruel. Needless to say cats and I don't get a long. It is in my nature and I cannot change it. But change it I did.

Actually, we did not go out into the world looking for a cat. The cat found us. It knocked on the front door with its little kitty paws and walked in. Do cats walk in? No, it was more like a saunter. It sauntered over to the kitchen table, sat down, and then ordered a saucer of our finest dairy product. After taking a sip and appearing satisfied he looked at us and said with the blankest of blank expressions, "I hear you have a...gay rodent problem."

The cat wanted half now and half when the job was completed.

The job was never completed.

The next morning I woke up with a disembodied cat head on the pillow next to me. In the garage the embodied (but with lack of head) part was spread out across the hood of my car. Blood and bowels slowly slipped down forming a gruesome pile on the cement floor.

hehehehehehehehehehe....scaredya, huh?

Nah...The kitty is fine. The hamsters, however, just scoff at the attempt to rid the house of them. They mock me constantly with the little signs they write. For example, "How about a little queer ham' for the straight freakin' idiot?". Then they laugh that evil little hamster laugh. It is a squeeky laugh, so it is hard to take seriously.